"Never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself... 'How did I get through all of that?'"
...when i was in Louisville last week for some R&R with old seminary friends, this quote was part of a worship experience i attended at my friend laura's new church start. as this thought 'came into my view' i read it over several times, and could not help be moved. i don't know who said it, and i doubt it will win any awards for being 'most profound', but moved i was nonetheless.
perhaps it is this present time in my life, perhaps it was the being with good friends, perhaps it was some much needed call/soul searching that only seems to get done when i am away...
but i believe these words will be with me for a while.
15 March 2007
13 March 2007
with a scotch and a smoke...
getting home from monthly church board meetings at 9:00 at night usually means drinking.
tonight, however, i am not. it was a decent meeting. no major anxiety or horrid accusations or defenses. and so i sit down at 9:55 to turn on the tv and have some 'down time."
Boston Legal is a show i have just watched a few times and never in its entirety. tonight was no exception finding just the last 5 minutes... but what i noted, at the very end of the show is the point in this long prelude...
okay... side note... all that is on at 10:15 is Sex in the City... and one of the girls dogs is named Elizabeth Taylor. i think that is hilarious. end side note.
...the two main male characters, perhaps at the end of each show...i don't know, but they seem to do it often... at the end of the day, after the office is closed, sit on the balcony with a scotch and a stogie. and they are glad for their friendship and the kind of conversations that are between friends after hours with a scotch and a stogie.
and what i realized is that i have that very thing in my life. in recent weeks i have become more aware of that which has always been so present, and life-saving. i can't begin to list the times and places where i have been with friends and found... well... the time i needed.
the time i needed to vent, to share, to question, to be witty, to be crass, to be sad, to be crazy, to know what to do, to tell someone else what to do, to be silent, to be loving, to pontificate, to listen, and most importantly to laugh and laugh some more.
the time i needed,
just at the right time.
i hope those who fall into this category will always know how i thankful i am.
tonight, however, i am not. it was a decent meeting. no major anxiety or horrid accusations or defenses. and so i sit down at 9:55 to turn on the tv and have some 'down time."
Boston Legal is a show i have just watched a few times and never in its entirety. tonight was no exception finding just the last 5 minutes... but what i noted, at the very end of the show is the point in this long prelude...
okay... side note... all that is on at 10:15 is Sex in the City... and one of the girls dogs is named Elizabeth Taylor. i think that is hilarious. end side note.
...the two main male characters, perhaps at the end of each show...i don't know, but they seem to do it often... at the end of the day, after the office is closed, sit on the balcony with a scotch and a stogie. and they are glad for their friendship and the kind of conversations that are between friends after hours with a scotch and a stogie.
and what i realized is that i have that very thing in my life. in recent weeks i have become more aware of that which has always been so present, and life-saving. i can't begin to list the times and places where i have been with friends and found... well... the time i needed.
the time i needed to vent, to share, to question, to be witty, to be crass, to be sad, to be crazy, to know what to do, to tell someone else what to do, to be silent, to be loving, to pontificate, to listen, and most importantly to laugh and laugh some more.
the time i needed,
just at the right time.
i hope those who fall into this category will always know how i thankful i am.
04 March 2007
would jesus have started any earlier?
well it was bound to happen. a church member at lunch today said "someone said today they were going to bring it up at the board meeting....about church not starting on time."
well when i got my eggs benedict swallowed, i started in... practicing for said board meeting, where the person will ask someone else to bring it up rather than be bold and direct.
(the context: we never start right at 10:45. there really is no way we could. but nonetheless, we never start after 10:52.)
1. perhaps that extra time could moments of personal reflection, mediation, prayer.... mark your hymns, chat it up with someone, take a nap. hell. if someone would give me an extra 4-5 minutes to just sit i would love it.
2. it all really starts at 10:25..... at which time i am trying to wind up sunday school. we get downstairs....doing some greeting, some last "setting of things" ....get caught by someone.....
then make sure the choir members and organist have moved from coffee hour to choir practice. throw in a few late choir members, and a slow organist, and wa-la it is 10:40.
the choir song through once, plus working out a tricky measure for the bass section.... then we are back to moving...
my much needed bathroom pit-stop and robing happens as the choir works their way to the sanctuary..... a double check to find that no one has turned the sound system on and wa-la it is 10:47 or later....
frankly i think we are pretty streamed lined for getting 15 people snacked, moved, robed, practiced, and moved again in 15 minutes.
3. perhaps this church member thought it just revolved around their schedule or watch.
4. perhaps this church member did not realize that there are still 10 people in the narthex, who apparently aren't as concerned about timing... when Jimmy starts the welcome.
or maybe this is one of those people. most likely so.
5. or maybe this person is passive agressive and discontented with the big sanctuary clock being taken down for painting and not replaced yet. (hell if i am putting that damn thing back up)
it will all remain to be seen.
i am just ever super glad to know that my people care about the big picture. :)
thanks be to God.
well when i got my eggs benedict swallowed, i started in... practicing for said board meeting, where the person will ask someone else to bring it up rather than be bold and direct.
(the context: we never start right at 10:45. there really is no way we could. but nonetheless, we never start after 10:52.)
1. perhaps that extra time could moments of personal reflection, mediation, prayer.... mark your hymns, chat it up with someone, take a nap. hell. if someone would give me an extra 4-5 minutes to just sit i would love it.
2. it all really starts at 10:25..... at which time i am trying to wind up sunday school. we get downstairs....doing some greeting, some last "setting of things" ....get caught by someone.....
then make sure the choir members and organist have moved from coffee hour to choir practice. throw in a few late choir members, and a slow organist, and wa-la it is 10:40.
the choir song through once, plus working out a tricky measure for the bass section.... then we are back to moving...
my much needed bathroom pit-stop and robing happens as the choir works their way to the sanctuary..... a double check to find that no one has turned the sound system on and wa-la it is 10:47 or later....
frankly i think we are pretty streamed lined for getting 15 people snacked, moved, robed, practiced, and moved again in 15 minutes.
3. perhaps this church member thought it just revolved around their schedule or watch.
4. perhaps this church member did not realize that there are still 10 people in the narthex, who apparently aren't as concerned about timing... when Jimmy starts the welcome.
or maybe this is one of those people. most likely so.
5. or maybe this person is passive agressive and discontented with the big sanctuary clock being taken down for painting and not replaced yet. (hell if i am putting that damn thing back up)
it will all remain to be seen.
i am just ever super glad to know that my people care about the big picture. :)
thanks be to God.
03 March 2007
you know you are in deep...
when in the same week, two different church members tell you where their secret house key is hidden... "just in case something should happen, and you would need to get in"
28 February 2007
wednesdays are full of it.
okay bear with me as we review.
some people are theological in their blogs. some are introspective. others are funny or sad.
mine for today is more of a reflection on how a day full of random crap can cause one to say "what the heck!"
6:45 a.m.: a major ice shower lasting the one hour kids were coming and going from the parsonage a la youth breakfast. (biscuits and gravy was a major hit....thanks to a gracious church lady.)
got to church finding that i did not have my house/church key set. $%#*!
(i have 'building keys' and 5 separate sets of keys, one for each car...for a total of 6. confusing most of the time.)
back home.
searched and searched. no keys.
went ahead to hannibal for disciple clergy cluster gathering.
generally worthless meeting. these people just don't like each other, nor do they have any desire to talk, relate, commiserate, or generally laugh. thanks be to God for our new area minister who tried to bring life to a group that should not be a group.
found keys in car seat in a spot i had searched twice. (this is a pattern, having lost them last wednesday night at church....finding them on my desk that had been searched twice.)
back to church to work feverishly for two hours prepping a bible study no one showed up for.
took advantage of said situation to do more prep for youth group. good showing. having major problem getting high schoolers....as in the girls who bring life to the deal. what to do. what to do. this combined with the high energy of 5 middle school boys, a church with no real gym or play space. wow.
okay, so now everyone has some perspective on their happy lives.....
serious notes: when one is out of ideas and doesn't seem to have the time ('seem' being the problematic term) or support to implement new ideas that would bring greater success to a ministry....what does this mean?....what does one do?
ps: i did laugh a whole lot at a book i have of cartoons from the comic strip "GET FUZZY"
hilarious cat et al. crazy in fact. i suggest checking it out asap.
some people are theological in their blogs. some are introspective. others are funny or sad.
mine for today is more of a reflection on how a day full of random crap can cause one to say "what the heck!"
6:45 a.m.: a major ice shower lasting the one hour kids were coming and going from the parsonage a la youth breakfast. (biscuits and gravy was a major hit....thanks to a gracious church lady.)
got to church finding that i did not have my house/church key set. $%#*!
(i have 'building keys' and 5 separate sets of keys, one for each car...for a total of 6. confusing most of the time.)
back home.
searched and searched. no keys.
went ahead to hannibal for disciple clergy cluster gathering.
generally worthless meeting. these people just don't like each other, nor do they have any desire to talk, relate, commiserate, or generally laugh. thanks be to God for our new area minister who tried to bring life to a group that should not be a group.
found keys in car seat in a spot i had searched twice. (this is a pattern, having lost them last wednesday night at church....finding them on my desk that had been searched twice.)
back to church to work feverishly for two hours prepping a bible study no one showed up for.
took advantage of said situation to do more prep for youth group. good showing. having major problem getting high schoolers....as in the girls who bring life to the deal. what to do. what to do. this combined with the high energy of 5 middle school boys, a church with no real gym or play space. wow.
okay, so now everyone has some perspective on their happy lives.....
serious notes: when one is out of ideas and doesn't seem to have the time ('seem' being the problematic term) or support to implement new ideas that would bring greater success to a ministry....what does this mean?....what does one do?
ps: i did laugh a whole lot at a book i have of cartoons from the comic strip "GET FUZZY"
hilarious cat et al. crazy in fact. i suggest checking it out asap.
25 February 2007
why i buy cars
every now and then i have to "rationalize" why i have so darn many cars.
well first of all, i am a car fanatic, freak, buff, and general lover.
second of all, i don't have pets or children.
third of all, they all have a "purpose" (or at least some of them do) in my life.
fourth of all, i believe that in the midst of all my good friends buying homes, having children, being in love, buying new cars etc... i too have a (subconscious) need to add to the family---get something new---etc.
and for me, that something new in these past 10 years has been cars that i love, adore, and have always had a thing for.
i realize this will not always be the case, (hoping to have all of the above too someday) but for now that is the way it is. furthermore, i know that no matter how many homes, children, and loves i have i will always have a few to many cars.
the cars:
my 1968 Chevrolet Chevelle Malibu two door hardtop, 307 V8, powder blue..... was my grandmother's car. i was the oldest and most attentive of the grandchildren and the only one who cared for her car with great passion. and so, upon her death she gave it to me. and i will forever be thankful. not only is it a great old car in great shape but also a part of life with my grandparents that i will always have. the Malibu is always kept in the garage, has not seen snow or salt since the first Bush administration and rarely even sees a raindrop. the historical plates read 'jimmy4' and it starts every time... never fail.
the Cadillacs. frankly i just love them. Lincolns too for that matter. but for now i am a Cadillac man. the history: in 1996 the family's Cadillac Sedan Deville was passed down to me to take to seminary... then i had a Lincoln Continental, then another Lincoln Continental Mark VI... then back to another Sedan Deville, then another (present one) and now the addition of the Fleetwood. i love the classic lines, the chrome, the leather, the feel, the ride, the power... it is just me.
there have been Dodge Convertibles, Chevy Suburbans, Oldsmobiles, T-Birds, in the mix too...
but that is why i buy cars, and always will.
well first of all, i am a car fanatic, freak, buff, and general lover.
second of all, i don't have pets or children.
third of all, they all have a "purpose" (or at least some of them do) in my life.
fourth of all, i believe that in the midst of all my good friends buying homes, having children, being in love, buying new cars etc... i too have a (subconscious) need to add to the family---get something new---etc.
and for me, that something new in these past 10 years has been cars that i love, adore, and have always had a thing for.
i realize this will not always be the case, (hoping to have all of the above too someday) but for now that is the way it is. furthermore, i know that no matter how many homes, children, and loves i have i will always have a few to many cars.
the cars:
my 1968 Chevrolet Chevelle Malibu two door hardtop, 307 V8, powder blue..... was my grandmother's car. i was the oldest and most attentive of the grandchildren and the only one who cared for her car with great passion. and so, upon her death she gave it to me. and i will forever be thankful. not only is it a great old car in great shape but also a part of life with my grandparents that i will always have. the Malibu is always kept in the garage, has not seen snow or salt since the first Bush administration and rarely even sees a raindrop. the historical plates read 'jimmy4' and it starts every time... never fail.
the Cadillacs. frankly i just love them. Lincolns too for that matter. but for now i am a Cadillac man. the history: in 1996 the family's Cadillac Sedan Deville was passed down to me to take to seminary... then i had a Lincoln Continental, then another Lincoln Continental Mark VI... then back to another Sedan Deville, then another (present one) and now the addition of the Fleetwood. i love the classic lines, the chrome, the leather, the feel, the ride, the power... it is just me.
there have been Dodge Convertibles, Chevy Suburbans, Oldsmobiles, T-Birds, in the mix too...
but that is why i buy cars, and always will.
19 February 2007
driving miss daisy
well i have succumbed. the Fleetwood is in my carport.
it is a behemoth... fins and all. just looking at its size and knowing how it rides down the road, it will be quite the land yacht. i think the church ladies will like it. and might i say, i already feel like Hoake in the movie Driving Miss Daisy, just looking at it.
my boating friends have already harrassed me that i said was i looking for a boat. ha.
and on the 2nd day of the week, jimmy got a new caddy... and it was good.
it is a behemoth... fins and all. just looking at its size and knowing how it rides down the road, it will be quite the land yacht. i think the church ladies will like it. and might i say, i already feel like Hoake in the movie Driving Miss Daisy, just looking at it.
my boating friends have already harrassed me that i said was i looking for a boat. ha.
and on the 2nd day of the week, jimmy got a new caddy... and it was good.
17 February 2007
spending time with the Queen
alright, i have always had a thing for the British and course HRH. so i have in recent months wanted to see the movie The Queen. after my time admiring madeline albright, i began the journey home....stopping first at the mall....finding some amazing deals at Eddie Bauer.... then i made it right on time to the 5:10 showing. what a great movie. Helen Mirian (sp) is really very good. it was amazing how well all the characters were portrayed.
after some thai food with friends, a good coffee, and a late night hospital visit i headed home in yet again a late night snow storm. really. enough is enough.
glad to be home and ready for the weekend.
ps: i looked at the cadillac. of course it is wonderful. i have no idea what to do. i have till wednesday.
after some thai food with friends, a good coffee, and a late night hospital visit i headed home in yet again a late night snow storm. really. enough is enough.
glad to be home and ready for the weekend.
ps: i looked at the cadillac. of course it is wonderful. i have no idea what to do. i have till wednesday.
16 February 2007
a luncheon with the Madame Secretary
well i have made a little jaunt to St. Louis. i had a dr. appt. here so decided that a day away was in order. presently i am finishing my frontega chicken panini w/ broc. soup a la St. Louis Bread Co., or as we here call it...."the bread company".... anway, there is a woman eating across the room that looks just like Madeline Albright. i was behind her in line and had to do a double take. now, grant you, i just came from Cokesbury (church bookstore) and happened across the former madame secretary's book.....so the old girl was on my mind.
frankly, i have always had a bit of a thing for Maddy. she does "her thing" so well. little frumpy suits and helmet hair... and i might note, that the present Foreign Secretary of Great Brittan reminds me of her also for the same reasons, but with a Margaret Thatcher-esque quality....
God save the Queen.
frankly, i have always had a bit of a thing for Maddy. she does "her thing" so well. little frumpy suits and helmet hair... and i might note, that the present Foreign Secretary of Great Brittan reminds me of her also for the same reasons, but with a Margaret Thatcher-esque quality....
God save the Queen.
15 February 2007
like a hole in the head
well i need another car like i need a hole in the head. but a nice local church lady called me today and said i had first dibs on her Cadillac.
can i just say, it is the only one in town like it, and i have personally drooled over the thing many times.
i told her a few years ago i would love to buy it. and she always sees me in town or at a function and says "not yet" even without my prompt.....and then today she calls.
geez. so now what? well of course i am going to look at it tomorrow!
i might add it has really low miles, has always been garaged, and is the largest land yacht ever made. it makes my present full size Caddy look like a compact car. :)
can i just say, it is the only one in town like it, and i have personally drooled over the thing many times.
i told her a few years ago i would love to buy it. and she always sees me in town or at a function and says "not yet" even without my prompt.....and then today she calls.
geez. so now what? well of course i am going to look at it tomorrow!
i might add it has really low miles, has always been garaged, and is the largest land yacht ever made. it makes my present full size Caddy look like a compact car. :)
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